It's become apparent even to the New York Times that there was no significant voter fraud in the recent election. This, however, has not prevented liberal cultist true believers like MoveOn.com and People for the American Way from fervidly clinging to the doctrine that the election must have been stolen somehow -- by Halliburton, no doubt.

It must be true; after all, they lost! That's evidence enough, I should think. The great mass of humanity has been hopelessly deceived, of course, because a consortium of government, media, business, scientists, theologians, and the Illuminati are conspiring to keep the Truth from us.

Fortunately, during this apocalyptic end-time era, a small, select group of special people -- led by the prophets George Soros and Barbara Streisand -- has been blessed to understand the Truth so they can warn the world of the impending doom being brought down upon it by the anti-christ, George W. Bush, and his evil cohorts.